This is going to be the final blog for Sniffles.

Realizing I’ve been the victim of constant and repeated emotional and physical abuse at the hands of Texas has made me re-evaluate my choices and how I live my life. I need a break from the steamy affairs.

This is my chance to live my life for myself finally, and part of that means Marie Kondo-ing everything that reminds me of him, and sadly that means this blog.

It’s been fun, until it wasn’t anymore. Thank you for reading my pleasures and remember that life is too short for bad sex.

My first twofer.

Let me just take a minute to say that today has been great.  Had a killer job interview, got to see Texas, had some delicious mexican food and was – up until about 10 minutes ago – setting up a night of sexy times.  Then, my food allergies decided that they wanted to pay me a visit…ON MY FACE.  So now I’m sitting here scratching the hives on my cheek hoping that my allergy pills kick in.  Thanks delicious mexican food for ruining my celebratory sexy time night.

So instead of my original plans I thought I’d tell you guys about the time I had my first twofer…

I’m like 18/19 years old and hanging out with the guy I was dating at the time and one of his friends.  I was pretty head over heels for this guy and the sex was pretty okay.  I knew there was one guy in his group of friends that was attracted to me, but I never really gave him a chance, and that guy knew it, we’ll call him The OG (Other Guy).   Well after a few joints and a few beers, the guy I was dating – lets refer to him as The Conductor – tells me to go get in bed and wait for him.  I do, gladly, I was horny and knew I was gonna get some before the night was over.

Sex with The Conductor was pretty vanilla for the most part.  Missionary, doggy style, missionary, doggy style then he’d cum.  To his credit, he knew how to stroke it just right to make it satisfying for me (read:  Not get me off all the time, but enough for it to be pleasurable).

This evening was no different, I just thought it was a bit strange for him to leave his friend in the living room to come bang me.  When he walked in I was sitting on the edge of his bed waiting, he unzipped his pants, grabbed me by the back of my head and brought me to his dick. He was always in control of me giving him head. The pace, the depth, even the techniques with my mouth, he told me what i would and wouldn’t do. Before we actually had sex, he stopped and asked me if I would be okay leaving the door cracked because according to him, “I want my boys to know how good you are in bed.”  Little ole me, of course was like, “HELL YEAH!”  Whatever.

He bent me over the bed and began to fuck me, per usual.  We went through the normal positions, and when he came he pulled out and came on my pussy and made sure to as he always said, “rub it in” (don’t ask). Pretty par for the course for him.  What wasn’t, was when he asked me if I’d pity fuck his friend…So like any good slutty girlfriend, I finally offered to give The OG what he wanted. The Conductor left me in his room and brought him in. Dude was hard as a rock from listening through the cracked door…which at the time creeped me out a bit, in hindsight kind of turns me on…

The thing about The OG was that he was a shy guy by nature and I was very submissive…meaning neither of us were going to make the first move.  So my ever-so-caring man decided he would “conduct the symphony” so-to-speak.  I never knew The Conductor could be anything other than mechanical with sex, but when he got The OG and I into action, he was all about the roughness.  He wanted to hear my ass being smacked and wanted to hear my whimpers with each strike. He kept coming up to me and asking me if I liked it and every time I said yes, I’d get another smack.   He was outright giving me what I wanted…and when we were done, my right ass cheek was bruised and he in the days following he made no issue of slapping me there to remind me of what a “good girl” I was.

So as I’m riding The OG, The Conductor asks me to turn around and face him (my back to The OG) and keep riding. He kneeled down and watched me take The OG.  Next thing I know, he’s got his face between my legs and is licking my clit as I’m bouncing on The OG’s dick. Fucking hot and at the time I considered it crazy…because I’d only ever seen that shit in pornos.

I feel like in my sexual career very few men have cum for me when I’ve been on top.  The OG did though. He had a condom on but when he came he slammed his hips up into me so hard it knocked me back onto his chest.  I felt bad when he finished because The Conductor wasted no time making us get dressed and cleaned up. The OG never really said much to me after that and eventually he moved away…

As for The Conductor, I asked why what happened took place…He admitted that he was turned on watching me give another man pleasure when I still had his hot cum on me. We never did anything like that again…but I guess it was practice for Texas maybe?


The time I hooked up at work

Office romances rarely work out. But I had met this guy at my job and my vagina went into hyperdrive. Immediately we started hanging out…then making out in his office.

Let’s call him John.

John was probably the best kisser I’ve ever had. He knew just how to alternate between sweet, soft kisses and wildly passionate ones. And the way he worked my mouth was the same way he worked my tits and clit. Holy fuck.

One particular night at work, after everyone left, John and I were getting steamy in his office until his pager went off alerting him something was wrong elsewhere in the building…so naturally we both went to check it out. Once we figured out that nothing was wrong we resumed our activities…

This led to me dropping to my knees and whipping his dick out behind the desk in the office we were in. He told me he never really liked receiving oral (what is it with men?) but was game if I wanted to do it.

SIDENOTE: I absolutely love everything about giving head. The feeling of a hard cock in my mouth turns me on more than spanking. I love the taste of cum…it’s to the point that the guy now calls me a “cum slut” and don’t even get me started about that moment just before a man cums when his body tenses up and he loses control of his body. Ugh. So hot.

Anyways. John had one of those dicks that was extremely curved. Upwards and to the right. It was pretty average other than the fact that it kind of reminded me of an elephant trunk when they’re making that house they make (you know the one.)

John was already a really giving person…but man was he just the sweetest head recipient ever…he gave me a temple and ear massage while I was gurgling his cock. It was weird.

So as he’s cumming, we hear a knock on the door. The overnight guy was there to relive him (as if I wasn’t enough lol) and his pants are around his knees and I’m frantically trying to swallow his load, make sure he didn’t accidentally cum on me anywhere else and put my tits back in my shirt.
We got caught. Know how we got caught? We forgot the door to the office had one of those long skinny windows…Mmhmmm….dude saw pretty much everything. I’ve done plenty of walks of shame, but I’ll tell you the most awkward one was having to slide past the overnight guy as I’m wiping the corners of my mouth.