Realizing I’ve been the victim of constant and repeated emotional and physical abuse at the hands of Texas has made me re-evaluate my choices and how I live my life. I need a break from the steamy affairs.
This is my chance to live my life for myself finally, and part of that means Marie Kondo-ing everything that reminds me of him, and sadly that means this blog.
It’s been fun, until it wasn’t anymore. Thank you for reading my pleasures and remember that life is too short for bad sex.
Strapped up, lubed up and fucked him til he came, then made him eat me out and fuck me with my vibrator.
Do you know how hot it is to dominate a man as a woman especially when you make him get on all fours and suck my dick? It’s fucking hot to grab him by his hair and making him choke on it. I totally get why guys do this to me all the time.
And I didn’t enter him slow and easy. I lubed us up and fucked his ass three ways to Sunday. Watching his face contort with pleasure as he rode my dick was so erotic. Goddammit.
I hope he wants to play again. I’d gladly fuck his ass again.
So in my travels back to singlehood, I’ve visited a place I went ONCE with Texas. The sex theater.
Since leaving him I’ve gone twice.
It’s great because I can either go, and fuck myself in a private booth with bossy onlookers peeking in, OR I can go and sit in the theater and find someone to play with publicly.
The first time I stayed in the booth for about 20 minutes masturbating. Had a few guys come and watch for a few minutes. Nothing spectacular.
The next time I played with a middle aged nerdy looking dude in the theater. He sucked on my tits for a while and I have him a hand job. He had an average dick so I wasn’t particularly having him inside me, and I let him finish himself on my tits.
Part of me is pissed that in our whole relationship “Mr. Cuckolding” only took me there once and only let me stay for like 10 minutes.
Part of me is glad we only went once because going solo is definitely more fun!
So last week, I went over to Texas’ house because I couldn’t sleep… I legit just went over to hang out.
Well I got there, and he’s in bed…okay, not a problem, we’ll just pillow talk.
It was nice to be in bed with him. Comforting to say the least, and it was so nice to not talk about “us” while we laid there spooning.
Then ya know, he started to do the thing that guys do where he starts to nuzzle his cock into my ass. And I mean, I was in a vulnerable place coming off a nervous breakdown. I wasn’t going to say no to a guaranteed orgasm…so I reciprocated…that went on for a little while longer until he got on top of me and spread my legs.
And we had some of the sexiest sex we ever had. Lots of kissing, lots of gentle stroking. A few orgasms on my part….then he started to talk about us having a baby together….while he was in me. Not gonna lie I was into that thought. But I was more into having another orgasm.
I had him turn me over and hit it from the back and he went to town so hard the headboard was smacking against the wall and I had to brace it so we didn’t wake up his new roommates. When finally came, we kept slowly fucking, something we never did before.
The sex was great and fun…but I think I hoped it’d trigger more feelings in me. Instead it just felt like I was fucking a guy I had no intention of being with in any more of a capacity than that. He and Taco are basically on the same level and that was kind of disappointing? But also liberating?
Idk. Any time Texas wants to bang it out I’d let him.
You ever fuck so hard you hurt yourself? Sure we’ve all pulled muscles and strained our backs…but like ever had a legit injury that you’ve got to recover from?
I did. Right after I found out about Texas’ lies (the first time). I went out and found the literal first dick I could find. And he wanted to fuck in a kitchen, at his place.
So he’s got me up on a counter top, and we kinda slid around as he was fucking me and I was kind of like half on the counter? Well I shifted my arms the wrong way and my tailbone came off the counter and was banging up against the edge of the counter.
You know how it is when you’re soooooo close to cumming and there’s no turning back or breaking that focus to the finish line? That was us. Just fucking to cum. And we did…and that’s likely when I bruised my tailbone. Because not only was he driving me into the edge of the counter with each stroke, but as he came, he pulled almost all the way out and slammed into me with such force that I hear a “pop” then felt this searing, sharp (then dull, aching) pain in my ass. Literally.
I could barely walk out of his house upright. Sitting in my car was so painful I cried the whole way home. And for the next month I had to sit on a fucking donut because anything else felt like Poseidon was ramming my ass with his trident.
Shit was bad. And that’s why the next time I let a dude fuck me in a kitchen I made sure to keep my feet firmly planted on the ground.
Mr. Safety just left. Probably won’t hear from him again after tonight lol
So to remind you from my earlier blog: he cane over last night and stayed until this morning. Left me a mess and I sent a pic to Texas of it and telling I wish he could clean me up before work. Then I lost my shot at Texas for leading me on all weekend while he’s involved with someone else. Why lead me on? And had I not called him on it, how long would it last? Anyways…
I told Mr. Safety about it and he came over to have sex. I forewarned him I wanted to fuck the anger away…and that I did. Now right as Mr. Safety showed up, I texted Texas apologizing for my behavior and asked to rewind to last Thursday, before he brought up feelings and after he fucked me (it was a great orgasm, I don’t want to forget that).
So Mr. Safety gets here and comes straight to my bedroom, I started off really sweet with him. Taking my time undressing him at the foot of my bed, caressing his cock until it barely stayed in his underwear, and gently sucking on his cock the same way he ate me out as I fell asleep.
Admittedly when I saw him starting to sway, it was like something overcame me. I was enraged and forced him down onto the bed under me. I climbed up on top of him and started to ride him harder than I’d ever ridden anyone. He tried to match my rhythm but eventually just gave in and let me have my way. He even let me choke him a little, which is always exciting.
He flipped me onto my stomach and continued to fuck me, but I started spewing all sorts of things I haven’t said in forever and meant:
“Fuck me like the whore I am”
“Gimme all your cum”
“I’m your cum dumpster”
“I want you ride me like the slut I am. Fuck me harder”
The whole deal lasted 30 minutes or so. When we finished I asked him to leave, said I had to go to bed. I’ve never seen a guy move so fast to get away from me. When I asked him if he was okay, his response was “yeah. I’ve just never been hate-fucked and that was intense.”
He tried to kiss me as he left. I dodged it and shut the door.
Needless to say everything I thought was true about Texas isn’t. He told me one thing and meant none of it. He led me on all weekend long without saying what was happening. So we’re done. Which is why old habits die hard.
Texted Mr. Safety so I can fuck the anger and pain away, he’ll be here in an hour. He’s going to get to see who I really am tonight.